They're laughing at you, all of them. They think you look weird. They think you look awful, like shit. They're laughing at you because you're ugly. They pity you. They're glad they are nothing like you at all, you freak.
Do I live up to the expectations I gave to myself? Most likely not. I’m sorry for wasting the time I have now. I’m truly sorry for not listening to myself before everything happened. I hope your happier then, than now. Should I be worried for my future?
Don't you hate it when people make a joke about you, about something that you are actually incredibly insecure about? And they don't realize it, but every laugh feels like a stab in your chest, because it hurts so much and brings up memories you'd rather forget, but you cant say anything, because then people would know your weaknesses. They'd know how insecure you really are. So instead you just laugh it off, and hide the pain you feel inside.